Sunday, October 28, 2007

14. Skinless Chicken

Cat Eyes.
Aluminum Foil.
You keep coming in here.
What the hell is that in your hand.
Laughing at myself.
Thump thump thump.
Ears and shakes.
Grubble grub.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

13. Disjointed Participle

Flashing fins and tails like swords to enemies unseen
the aqueous air is better where the sun can only hope to creep.

12. Damn the Man

After getting my annual review yesterday, I'm feeling really upset with my job. I had a very nice review, and I got the 4% raise I hoped for.
I was informed, however, that my interpersonal saavy needs improvement. I have never gotten a needs improvement on anything the entire time I have worked here. In the past year, I feel I have not only done what was expected of me, but gone above and beyond my job description. I have helped out with outside projects, and I get along with everyone except for one particular muffin breathed douche-bag who I no longer have any interaction with. According to my current and previous supervisors, they want me doing more project work and being more involved with other departments. Frankly, I find this assessment to be incredibly insulting. Rather than encourage me to branch out and mold myself into the corporate monkey they so desperately want me to be, I feel compelled to shut down completely and do the absolute bare minimum I need to get by.
What is so wrong with coming to work and doing the job I was hired to do? I want nothing more than to be left alone, responsible for no one but myself, where things were quiet and happy, and I could be productive.
To make things worse, we're moving to new cubicles next week, and I found out yesterday that I will not be sitting next to my comrade in arms as I was promised I would be. I had one simple request, which I know they were capable of accomodating, and they choose to deny it after promising me that it was no problem. Instead, I get a shitty end cube next to the other idiot in my work group, who I have mentally labeled "Catty Matty", and across from a truly obnoxious new hire who is to dense to realize he should leave me alone. Not only will I be babysitting Mr. Matty to be sure he's doing his job, picking up his slack, and spending 8 hours a day fuming over his general incompetence, but I'll be forced to listen to the inane ramblings of a teardrop tattooed, hood-rat-wanna-be mama's boy who already pesters me as much as possible via email from the opposite side of the room. I can only imagine the mind-numbing conversations I have to look forward to. My only hope is that I can turn my headphones up so loud my eardrums actually burst, thus saving me from the aural torture that is soon to consume a third of my existence.
All of this wonderful news comes riding in on the coattails of a particularly sweet job opening upstairs, which my dearest friend is beyond qualified for. Should he get it (which I hope very much for his sake that he does), I will be left stranded in a sea of mentally defunct and egocentric rejects.

I have to get out of this department.