Monday, April 28, 2008

36. Random Things

Vacation was a fabulous escape, and one that was much needed. The instant I left town I immediately disconnected from my job and even Seattle as a whole. I'm not sure the last part was a good thing, as things took some getting used to again when I returned. I spent just over a week fantasizing over where I'd move if I didn't live here. Dangerous thinking, I tell you. It's cheaper in St. Louis, by far. I have to remind myself why I left in the first place, after spending 10 days soaking in the people I've missed the most and finding new reasons to love the places I'd grown sick of. Mostly, I've got some sort of gypsy blood in me. Maybe not so bad as my brother, but every few years I get a bad case of wanderlust and want to run for no specific reason. I bore easily I think.

I've been trying to compartmentalize all the aspects of my life lately, to try and identify those portions which have been making me less than happy. I have determined that I am rather tired of my job. But I have no where else to go, and it isn't really that bad...I'm just feeling a need for a change, and I can't seem to shake it off. I applied at a vet's office this week, which I had promised myself I wouldn't do. I have so many pets at home, it seems excessive to spend an 8 hour work day surrounded in the company of even more animals. But it was too nice a situation to pass up, and so I thought I'd give it a try.
They haven't called.

In other news, I start beginning Japanese classes this week. Matt, Soren and Matt Z. are taking them with me, so it should be a good time. I know a very few words or phrases in Japanese and look forward to expanding my comprehension of the language. I took two years of Spanish in high school and got less out of it than I have using my Japanese self study programs, just for the simple fact that I had no interest in speaking Spanish and despised my teacher. She really was a cow...

And in complete contradiction of my innate urge to wander, comes another pet. Two, if you count Matt's.

Friday night I was walking Frank back from the park next to our house with Soren and Matt, (and their respective dogs Ein and Pie), when Frank lunged at something I thought was trash on the sidewalk. Someone, I don't even know who, quickly realized it was not trash, but an animal, and pried Frank's mouth open to let it escape. It turned out to be a small black and white domestic rat, which dashed into the hedge next to the sidewalk. I could still see its tail sticking out, so I reached in and pulled it out, because I knew a domestic rat wasn't going to survive on its own in the wild. He was completely adorable, and I decided to keep him. We made plans to go and get a cage after we dropped off the dogs.

As we were walking up to our house, I realized it was bleeding from a small spot on its belly. I was worried, so we decided to take it to the vet first to be sure Frank hadn't caused any internal damage. The vet checked him over and decided he was just shaken, and maybe a little sore. She decided to give him an anti-inflammatory shot to help him feel a little better, and took him in the back. A few minutes later the vet returned to say she'd discovered a bright green patch on his tail, which led her to inspect his mouth. It turns out my new little rat had ingested rat poison. His tongue was swollen and his teeth were coated in the same bright green. We had no choice but to euthanize him to save him from a horrible, painful death.

I was crushed. I couldn't stop crying. I don't know why I'd let myself get so attached, but he was so absolutely precious, and I thought he had found the perfect home.
Instead he died.

Matt and Soren felt so bad they took me to Petco, where Soren bought me a huge rat mansion. On Saturday Matt took me back to pick out my rat. Later that night we went back to get one for Matt so she wouldn't be alone.

After days of indecision, I finally thought of the perfect name today.
Shortcake.


Te-heee! I completely love her. She's the girliest, cutest, most adorable thing ever.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

35. Toes Out

I've decided to open this blog to the public. I'm think I'm feeling brave, or particularly secure, or maybe just a bit exhibitionistic, I don't know. Exposing all my guts feels a bit like wandering the streets in a trenchcoat with nothing underneath. We'll see. I may get embarrassed and run back home for a pair of trousers.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

34. Fish Head

My doggie does not like ooky meats.

I've been feeding Frank an all raw diet for two weeks now, with a lot of success. This morning’s breakfast however, consisted of a raw catfish head and a piece of piggie kidney. I had given him a fish head over a week ago which he ate, but grudgingly. I assumed that he would eventually eat this as well, given enough time. But he just sniffed both and walked away.

I threw away the kidney (in the dumpster outside) and put the fish head in his crate in the hopes he would eat it on the way to work. Not only did he refuse to eat it, Frank spent the entire ride to work arranging his crate so that he could sit as far from it as possible.

Because I was seriously concerned I would return to a car which stunk of fish this afternoon, I decided the best course of action would be to dispose of the head. The car ride had been relatively quiet for several minutes, until I imagined myself tossing the fish in the trash can near the entrance to my work. Picturing the look on people’s faces as they passed by, being hit by the smell of now warm fish head, or possibly being attacked by the seagulls attempting to retrieve said fish from the garbage was too much for me.

I laughed out loud. Maniacally.

When I explained to Soren why I was laughing, he suggested I should do something better with it. Like throw it in the bank parking lot across the street from my work. We have a sort of long harbored vendetta against the employees of said bank. They once screamed at me because Frank decided to poop on the grass at the edge of their property. They were especially furious when I then used their dumpster to dispose of the poo, and accused us of trespassing.

Tossing a fish head in their lot to attract the gulls from the recycling center down the street seemed like the perfect revenge.

So I did.

I wrapped the head in a small sandwich bag I found under my car seat, so I wouldn’t have to touch it. As we passed by the bank lot, I threw it, sort of squeezing the bag at the same time, so that the head leapt from my hand like a slippery bar of soap and went skittering across the bank lot. It landed with the most satisfyingly wet plop of meat on pavement I could have ever asked for.

Then we ran away laughing.
The end!

Sunday, April 6, 2008

33. Four Days

It's Sunday. I just picked Ayako up from the airport, and have returned home to drink. I wish to light Mario on fire, as he is a spiteful little Italian man who is hellbent on ruining my good time. Video games should be relaxing, and Mr. Mario is stressing me out.

I somehow managed to throw out my back this evening while driving. Actually, it probably had nothing to do with driving so much as repeatedly attempting somewhat intermediate yoga poses without stretching this week. It just really locked up as I was getting out of my car tonight. It burns, yow yow yow...

In four days, I leave for St. Louis. I am in supreme anticipation of this trip. I know it's going to be awesome. I mean, just the fact that I don't have to show up to work for 11 days straight is amazing. But I'm sitting here worrying over superficial things like my skin, my tummy and my wardrobe as if I'm about to go to my 10 year high school reunion. Though seeing as I have no intention of showing my face at such an event, I kind of feel this takes the place of one. I'm about to see all of my college friends, most of whom I haven't gotten to hang out with in 3 or 4 years. We've all kept in touch via Myspace, but I'm still feeling apprehensive. It should be simple, and probably will be once I'm there. I'm making it complicated for no real reason outside of my own nervousness. But *yarf*.

And now I've gone and broken my little spine.